BDSM survey #1

1. I have a tendency to take control within an interaction because leaving it directionless feels worse than deciding how it should proceed.

1. During my interactions, I tend to be the one who gets things started

1. Giving instructions is a natural part of how I interact with my play partners.

1. 1. I am drawn to authoritative roles because of the respect they receive.

1. I tend to adjust what happens during a play scene so everything works together.

I tend to be the one who decides what kinds of attitudes, responses, or behaviors are appropriate within the dynamic.

1. Before leadership has been established within a dynamic, I naturally begin acting in a leadership role.

1. I tend to see it as my responsibility to make sure other people comply with established rules.

1. I want my preferences to determine what my partner does during our interactions.

1. When authority roles are possible, I usually choose the highest ranking one.

1. I tend to determine what behaviors fit and which do not fit the dynamic.

1. I tend to expect my play partners to follow my directions.

1. I often assume responsibility for defining how things will work.

1. I tend to coordinate the different parts of a play scene.

1. I usually take the lead in defining the norms governing my interactions.

1. I often find myself leading without consciously deciding to do so.

1. When I have a preference about how an interaction should proceed, I tend to act on it rather than simply hope it happens that way.

1. My play partner should orient their actions around mine during our interactions.

1. I feel most comfortable when I am the one making the decisions within my interactions.

1. I often tell my play partners what they should do.

1. I usually redirect behaviors that don't match how I want the dynamic to unfold.

1. I tend to correct behaviors I dislike until they improve

1. I do not mind when someone else decides what we will do.

1. I naturally try to shape my play partners' actions during our interactions.

1. It is I who often decides who should do which tasks.

1. I tend to regularly check on what my play partner(s) are doing during an interaction.

1. Whether my play partner follows my lead or not makes little difference to me during our interactions.

1. I tend to take the leadership role in my interactions, whether or not one already exists.

1. I generally address situations before they drift away from the expectations I have established.

1. When an interaction begins to stall because neither of us is deciding what to do, my discomfort with the situation tends to make me take the directing role.

1. Interactions are more satisfying to me when I can influence my play partner’s behavior.

1. I naturally expect my partner to follow my lead during our interactions.

1. I rarely let my influence over a dynamic fade without trying to reestablish it.

1. I usually remind my play partners of the expectations that guide our interaction.

1. I prefer dynamics that are shaped around my partner's preferences rather than my own.

1. I tend to be the one who assigns roles within my dynamics.

1. When a dynamic starts drifting away from our agreed expectations, I naturally bring it back on track.

1. I tend to make sure my play partner follows through on what is expected of them.

1. During my interactions, I naturally take on the role of giving directions.

1. Within my interactions, I tend to gravitate toward roles that place me above the other people involved.

1. When expectations have not been established, I tend to specify them.

1. I rarely let a behavior I want changed in my play partner to continue without doing something about it.

1. I tend to be drawn to positions that carry high status.

1. I often assign responsibilities during my interactions.

1. I dislike leaving decisions within my dynamics to someone else.

1. I find it unexpected when my play partner does not follow the directions I give.

1. I rarely wait for my play partner to start the dynamic.

1. Within our scenes, I tend to require my play partner to account for their actions.

1. I naturally slip into the leadership role during my interactions.

1. I tend to intervene when I want my play partner to change a behavior.

1. I tend to regard my play partner's compliance with established rules as something I should help ensure.

1. I dislike it when interactions drift away from the way I established them.

1. Within our scenes, I take the role of holding my play partner accountable.

1. I don't enjoy it when my influence over the dynamic decreases.

1. I tend to be the decision-maker within my interactions.

1. I often influence how situations unfold during my interactions.

1. I tend to organize how people and activities fit together during a play scene.

1. I feel out of place when I am not the one leading.

1. I like taking the lead during my interactions.

1. I tend to ensure my play partner gets the benefits and owns the consequences of their actions within my interactions.

1. When establishing roles within my interactions, I usually position myself above the others involved.

1. I prefer being the one who determines the overall direction during my interactions

1. I am the one who sets things in motion during my interactions.

1. I tend to check that my play partners are following the instructions given.

1. I naturally approach my interactions with the intention of influencing my play partner's behavior.
   

1. Within my dynamics, if neither person is taking the lead, I tend to step in and determine what happens next.

1. I let the course of my interactions develop on its own without trying to shape it.

1. I tend to want to know how things are going during an interaction.

1. It is part of my role to ensure my play partner meets the expectations we agreed.

1. I want to know everything that is going to happen during an interaction

1. Small departures from how I intended the interaction to unfold rarely go unaddressed.

1. I often find myself deciding how things should be done in a new situation.

1. I find leading roles more appealing when they are viewed with admiration by my play partner(s).

1. Maintaining my influence over the dynamic is important to me.

1. I tend to check in on what my play partner(s) have done after they've been given something to do.

1. I don't feel the need to keep track of everything happening during an interaction.

1. I tend to be the one who keeps everything working together during my interactions.

1. I regularly make sure agreed expectations are being met during my interactions.

1. I am more comfortable leading than following.

1. I generally assume my play partner will do as I say.

Which of the following best describes your role or orientation?

How much experience do you have with these types of dynamics?

How do you mainly engage with these dynamics?